Communication
Communication, it’s something we all struggle with, even through we’ve been doing it since we were born. We find ourselves time and time again getting in trouble through our words when we communicate poorly with others, especially in our relationships. It’s amazing how the average person can generate about 50 thoughts per minute, that means we have fifty chances to say something dumb before we have the time to process it first before speaking… no wonder communication is so hard! Often, we communicate with others with more than just our words, we can do it through 3 different methods.
1. Words. Speech is your basic way of communicating through words. This is how we tell people we are hungry or not feeling well, it how we express our thoughts and emotion.
2. Tone. You probably experienced a time when you said something and it came out harsher than you meant it to be and someone got offended, this all happens due to our tone. We can say the same word/words but depending on the tone we use it can be taken in different ways. This is why texting can be such a dangerous game because you can’t hear the tone of the person sending the text, so it’s up to the receiver to guess or interpret the tone that was intended for that text.
3. Non-verbal. This is when we communicate through our body language. The way we stand, or our facial expression sometimes says more about how we are feeling than actually saying anything.
That’s why it is so important to learn how to communicate affectively within our relationships and our marriage. Be intentional. Do we think about our intent before we speak or act? It’s so easy to say something we will regret if we don’t think about who we are talking to and there needs as a person. When we try to be intentional in all things this pushes us to think deeper, think smarter as we interact with others. We have control over what we say and do.
We forget that we have control over the way we communicate. Though it will take a lot of work to change, we choose what method of communication that is used in our homes. We might be apprehensive about trying to change the way we communicate because it could be weird or awkward if it’s outside of our comfort zone because of our family culture. Like if you grew up in a house where physical affection wasn’t a thing, it might be weird for you to start hugging your family members is that’s not what everyone is used to, but the more we do something the more we adapt and feel comfortable. We have the amazing opportunities in our own family units to find out how we communicate together.
In families we can have what we call “Family counsel” Elder Russell M. Ballard of the quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught that we must counsel together as a family and that we should model it after the churches council meetings held with the First Presidency and the Twelve among other leadership callings in the church. We first start with expressing love to one another, then you open with a prayer to invite the spirit, discuss to consensus regarding the Lords will, closing prayer to confirm that the decision made is right, and close with refreshments to bring you all together. As we implement this process in our families we might just find that we are communicating in a healthier way that all voices and options can be heard in our family and that we can receive guidance and direction from our Heavenly Father.
This is Our Happy Place 